Tayla Davis FHM South Africa May 2011

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Tayla Davis FHM South Africa May 2011

Irina Shayk Luli Fama Swimwear Collection 2011

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Irina Shayk Luli Fama Swimwear Collection 2011

Alessandra Ambrosio GQ Brazil April 2011

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Alessandra Ambrosio GQ Brazil April 2011

Candice Swanepoel Victoria’s Secret Swim 2011

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Candice Swanepoel Victoria’s Secret Swim 2011

Lily Aldridge Victoria’s Secret Bridal Wear 2011

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Lily Aldridge Victoria’s Secret Bridal Wear 2011

Brittany Snow Maxim US April 2011

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Brittany Snow Maxim US April 2011

Blanca Suarez FHM Spain March 2011

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Blanca Suarez FHM Spain March 2011

Audrina Patridge Bongo Bikini Spring 2011

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Audrina Patridge Bongo Bikini Spring 2011

Elle Liberachi FHM France March 2011

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Elle Liberachi FHM France March 2011

WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY??

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Two weeks ago was my 35th birthday and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway.

I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say "Happy Birthday" and probably a present for me.

Forget "Happy Birthday", She didn't even say "Good Morning".

I thought, "Well, that's wives for you, the children will remember".

Children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.

I started to the office I was feeling pretty low.

As I walked into my office my secretary, Janet, said, "Good morning, boss. Happy Birthday."

And I felt a little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon.

Then, Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know,
it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."

I said,! " That's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go." We went to lunch.

We didn't go where we normally go; we went out to the country to a little private place.

We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day.

We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment,

she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go change."

"Sure," I excitedly replied. I start getting excited & i thought today is my lucky day.

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes,

she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by..........

my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing "Happy Birthday".

And there I sat... on the couch... naked....!!!!!!

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